1/29/2014

Family institution dysfunctional

Do we still have this institution called family? Many of the oldies do not seem to have such an institution that is supposed to take care of them and their needs at old age. Ok there are exceptions for some oldies with huge extended families. No need to know about the rich as they will take care of themselves very well with or without the family institution. The oldies in charity homes and those living on their own or with friends cannot fall back on the family to support them. Some may be too comfortable financially to prefer to live in the richness of a retirement village minus the family institution.

Many who are seeking financial assistance from the govt have been told to seek support from their kins, their family ties. In reality this is not so simple. Not many families have millions in their savings and could spare a few dimes for their kins in distress. Many families are struggling to make ends meet and have a load of problems of their own.

One thing for sure, the aid givers or dispensers would never be able to understand why the children or siblings are so heartless to leave their kins in need to the state. It is beyond them until the day they fell into the same shoe.

The family institution is there but not there for another reason. And this will get worst with the new generations. What kind of family institution can one be talking about when there is one, or maybe two children in a family? The small nuclear family often fell victims to circumstances through many things that would break up the little family tree, natural casualty and calamity, financial hardship or simply living too far apart or emigration.

Since the days of Stop At Two, the role of family institution had been undermined and clobbered to death. But the old mindset of social workers and even politicians remains unchanged, thinking that there is this great family institution that could provide a big umbrella to protect those who need protection.

The family as an institution is about as good as it is among the Malay families when a household could have four or more children. The tragedies of broken families aside, the Malay families still could fall back on the family institution in better shape than the other communities.

It is time to take stock of the relevance of the family institution as a social support network for the people. It is there but not there. If there, many are too small to make a difference when faced with a very high cost of living. The family institution is as good as defunct, consigned to the museum as a memory of the past.

It is easy to bring up children when the cost of living is low. It is easy to look after parents too, and better still with many siblings. When the cost of living is high, extremely high, when there are no siblings to lend a helping hand, it is tough to look after the seniors. The new sandwiched class is going to face a monumental financial wall to look after their parents and children. Caveat, this does not affect the rich.

In the not too distant future people will be asking, where is the family, where is the family support, or may totally forgotten that there was such an institution.


Kopi level - Yellow

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

The PAPigs is just using "family" as an excuse not to spend money on social services.
It's always better to spend money on foreigners than on Singaporeans.

This is what Singaporeans want.
At least the daft 60%.

So as long as we keep voting PAPigs.
The Singaporean family will continue to be overworked and un-paid.
Un-paid because the Singaporean family is doing & paying for all the social services that PAPigs don't want to do.

Anonymous said...

Agreed, family support is now dyfunctional, or even non existent for most and I believe will get worse in future.

But this has not affected the majority voters support for PAP every election.

So the conclusion is whatever support that becomes dyfunctional is a separate issue from majority support for PAP every election.

Anonymous said...

60% can support themselves or have family support to rely on. So there is no issue for these 60% as well as for PAP.

Just 60%, and there will be no issue. No issue of PAP being voted out lah.

Anonymous said...

The 60% and the 40% are two separate issues.

Loyalty to PAP and loyalty to Singaporeans are also two separate issues.

patriot said...

When the family breaks down. The Country they live in naturally goes kaput. When a member is mired in familial problem, the Land he/she resides in is inconsequential. Saving oneself and the family is already insurmountable, where to find the spirit to care about anything. With lesser children has proven that it does not translate into the kids getting more love. They are entrusted to maiden, infant care, nanny, neighbour and some unfortunately get abandoned. They are likely to grow up away from the busy parents who are likely not close to their own parents. Many young parents do not even trust their own parents, grandparents of their child, to be able to bring up the kid to their expectations.
When the boys reach 18 years of age, NS will take them away from their families. Following that quiet a high numbers are sent overseas for studies, this includes daughters as well.
How does family bond be possible with afore-mentioned circumstances? And worse is to come when the youngs start chasing after money and lover after their studies?
A society that cares little for family relationships has no foundation for nationhood and it is destined to fail badly as a country.

patriot

patriot said...

Corrections to 'maiden' and 'quiet'.
They should be 'maid' and 'quite'.

My apology.

patriot

Matilah_Singapura said...

The idea of "family" is rapidly being redefined.

With the gradual acceptance of same sex and transgendered couples, like it or not (mostly not, but it's changing) old-fashioned ideas of "family" are quickly becoming obsolete.

Also the old idea of "extended family" is now being contracted to just "family".

The idea that "family" means "same blood" is also dying a much needed death.

"Dysfunction" is a common occurrence is just about all relationships. Relationships are plastic -- they never stay the same all the time.

So relac lah everyone. New Year is here. Enjoy the makan, drinking and gambling please -- with the families -- those of your blood, and those you choose to include.

Anonymous said...

Family means same blood.
So what?
You die, can your family help you?
Will they help you?

Singaporean means citizen of Singapore.
So what?
You die, can your country help you?
Will your country help you?

PAP is the government.
So what?
You die, can PAP help you?
Will PAP help you?

"Get out of my uncaring face"
That's the most likely response.
Tiok boh?

Anonymous said...

So let's stop this bullshit charade.

Stop asking our sons to do national service for Singapore.
When there is no intention whatsoever of helping our sons when they need hep in return.
Like getting a job.
Getting into university.
Buying a HDB flat.

b said...

Actually the oldies do not have to end up this way if they did not kick out the british 50 years ago. they traded in their british passport for a lousy sing passport and lousy future for their kids. with a british passport, one is entitled to pension, medical and benefits plan just like any british and access to eu. asia for asians was exactly what the japs sold to asians during ww2 to control asia and people so easily buy into that kind of bullshits. why believe someone who worked for the jap as translator and thus traitor during ww2?