Journalists are very well paid today

I have been writing too much rubbish and well deserving of my 2 cups of kopi kau daily. Maybe I should be writing something more high brow, serious and entertaining, maybe they will pay me $10k or $20k for writing the right stuff.

For a Sunday morning I think I shall start to write about my expensive pedigree miniature dog named Poo. After walking the dog for so many months, I came to notice that the poo comes in many textures, like cream puff, coleslaw at times, or Thai meat floss though not that dry. And if lucky, could be like goreng pisang. Can write one page about it.

Or maybe I shall write about the latest underwear, the unisex type, both male and female can get into. It requires great designing skills, if you know what I mean. Or maybe I shall write about the new hobbies, collecting toothpicks like they used to collect match boxes from the pubs and coffee houses.

Really, there are many interesting things to write to be paid handsomely. Collecting boyfriends like collecting mobile phones could be a great topic to write about. It used to be collecting angmoh boyfriends to show off to the aunties. If unable to get an angmoh get a local dud to dye his hair blond also can do, from a distance.

I heard the latest is collecting Indian boyfriends. They are in vogue, with so many maharajahs splurging millions for their weddings here. The local chicks may be lucky to land up with one. Now there is no need to go all the way to India with all the risks at stake. In the safety of this clean city, the rich Indians of the highest caste are available right at our doorstep. Just offer yourself, get close to them and you would be noticed. Make your own chances, improve your chances. The smell and colours of India are here.

I just have so many ideas to write about on a Sunday morning. I am waiting to be offered a $10k job to start writing. Maybe if they like it, they may even offer me $20k. Why would I want to be writing rubbish for two cups of kopi, and to beg for it, and OPM some more.

Isn’t it nice to talk rubbish and smell the roses on a weekend? This morning is a bit wet but still refreshing.


Anonymous said...

You are getting funnier by the day, red bean pau. On the way to being Art Buchwald. These journalists are really filthy rich. 5 figure salary. And don't forget the beautiful bonuses and performance bonuses SPH pays each year. That's why they don't mind selling their souls. Today I will buy you kopi kau kau.

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

Good morning and thank you for the kopi. I buy my own toast with kaya : )

Anonymous said...

Aiya Mr TaoSau Pau, tmr 7 am wait for u at BF ( not blur f-uck hah ) , underground link there near MBFC has the best yaya toast with kaya and butter lah with 2 tender soft boiled eggs laid by chickens in the coops still not "raped" and eaten by the wolves yet. MOM! No OPM! Now readers begging u to let them buy u yaya toast meal can? Pls continue to write, pls ............! Without savouring your tausau pau flavouring posts every morning before breakfast, even the best kopi would be tasteless liao.

Ⓜatilah $ingapura⚠️ said...

Please lah redbean. Journo's are amongst the least respected in the area of writing. They are mainly known as HACKS.

To get "street cred" as a writer, the best bet is to become a published author or write for the theater and screen.

Writing nonsense for the Sunday paper is just part of the revenue model to make the paper heavy and fat so the publisher can charge premium for advertising space.

Anonymous said...

As long as the pay is so good, who cares about credibility.

Anonymous said...

You sleep well every night, because you enrich other's soul.

b said...

Real issues can cause the rulers to lose powers. No rulers in this world like journalists to write about the real issues. They prefer those journalists to write about superficial, fashionable, erotic stuff. Once the minds are occupied by those useless stuff, the real issues will never see day light and they can remain in power for a longer period.