9/10/2014

Outsourcing the way to Go

Pardon my pun, it is real. Outsourcing is the greatest discovery of Sin City and we did it so well that we can end up shaking our legs and don’t have anything to do. We first outsourced our banking answering services to call centres, then we outsourced the whole IT functions to foreigners. We outsourced our construction industry to foreign workers and our service sectors to foreigners as well.

Our foodcourts and hawker centres are also being outsourced, including our famous Geylang. All have been taken over by foreigners. Our beggars would also have been outsourced if not of our strict laws to prohibit begging. But the fun side of begging is allowed and outsourced, like busking.

Our top management jobs in GLCs and the private sector are increasingly being outsourced to foreign talents. Oops, some have become instant citizens with the issue of pink identity cards. Our universities are also outsourcing their professorships to foreign academics. Our Medical services too are being outsourced, from nursing to doctors and specialists/consultants. Our civil service is also gradually being outsourced. Oh, I forgot, we will also be outsourcing our tertiary students like we outsourced our sports talents. Our students can rest or if they want to, can enrol in the polytechnics.

Now they are thinking of outsourcing the police and the soldiers. It will soon be a reality when the volunteers’ corp proves its worth. We can even do away with NS and let foreigners put on our military and police uniforms.

The final step in outsourcing will be the govt, the political leadership. When this last step is done, our leaders would have a lot of time to make state visits to countries after countries for networking and fellowship. And if they like it, they could go and watch our outsourced sportsmen and women competing in the Olympics, Asian Games, Commonwealth Games and World Cup, and to cheer them to victory. This will raise the morale of the outsourced sportsmen and women and motivate them to win more medals for the citizens to celebrate on their return. Yes we will be like the Romans, the ruling class. Our leaders could go on study missions too. The bulk of the work to govern the country would be delegated to the foreign talents acting as ministers and prime minister.

The best part of this is that when the foreign talents fumbled, even if they are appointed as ministers or prime minister, they can be fired immediately. It is difficult to do this if the prime minister or ministers are Singaporeans. And the people will be happy as there will be accountability. Non performing foreign talent ministers would be fired like in the private sector.

There is a slight problem though. What would the citizens and leaders be doing with all the free time they have if everything is outsourced? Would they be making themselves redundant when they have nothing else meaningful to do, except maybe counting money or speculating in properties?

Oursourcing is the way to GO indeed.


Kopi Level - Green

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes, the data collection for Social Experiment Singapore V1 is almost complete. The next phase involves the mass importing of foreigners from less developed countries and to ascertain the amount of time needed to get these foreigners to settle down and indoctrinate them into Sinkie culture.

Hopefully I am proven wrong, that this outsourcing is motivated merely for monetary gain and not some darker reason.

Anonymous said...

"What would the citizens and leaders be doing with all the free time they have if everything is outsourced?"
RB

Hahahahaha.

Smart Sinkies, including instant Sinkies, will know how to make money lah of course, through outsourcing, or in spite of outsourcing.

And whether by design or by chance, smart Sinkies will be at least 60% of all Sinkies.

Therein lies the future for Sinkieland. Tio bo, u say lah?

Anonymous said...

"Therein lies the future for Sinkieland. Tio bo, u say lah?"
Anon 9:05 am

Tiok. Not only in the future, but already happened in the past, before 2011. And now still happening lah, of course.

Anonymous said...

Anything wrong?

If wrong, then why Sinkies not ready to make it right hah, whether past, present or even future?

Matilah_Singapura said...

@ economically clueless whoever-you-are:

Look at yourself, and then around you. Notice what you failed to notice: EVERYTHING (with the exception of natural sunlight and breathable air) which supports your continued existence is OUTSOURCED: your clothes, the electricity, the lights, the aircon, your food, your transport, your electronica, furniture], the building...plus all the labour, capital and management it took to bring all those things into existence.

"Outsourcing" is nothing more than humans helping each other, and themselves. Outsourcing is Adam Smiths Invisible Hand at work.

So yes, "outsourcing" is DEFINITELY the way to go.

Anonymous said...

Outsourcing should result in efficiency and cost reduction. Government departments are traditionally very cumbersome and bureaucratic. Outsourcing should also bring with it accountability. Singapore is doing the right thing in balancing outsourcing with the aim for population growth. RB is totally wrong when he mentioned outsourcing of the medical personnel. These nurses and doctors/consultants etc are all working in Singapore That is not outsourcing. I always think it is good to invite such people into the country to help improve the efficiency of the medical service enjoyed by all Singaporeans. I do not see what is wrong in that at all. RB talks about the construction industry. Construction industry in Singapore are mainly undertaken by either Singaporean based firms or MNCs. That is free trade surely and not outsourcing. Companies tender for projects and winners carry out the work. Employees of such firms go for the cheapest labour force, be it engineers (locals or foreign}, admin staff or site workers. Singaporeans do not like working in the hot sun and therefore such hard work has to be done by the cheap imported labour from neighbouring countries. That is also not outsourcing. That is business. So, RB please be more accurate when you simply hantam all the things you mentioned in your post. I am sure you are just jesting when you touched on outsourcing the government. Ridiculous and laughable.

Matilah_Singapura said...

@1039:

Private (aka outsourced) police, courts and military have been covered by (usually libertarian) writes like Murray Rothbard and David Friedman (son of Milton and Rose).

Here's an excerpt from David Freidman's "The Machinery of Freedom: Guide To A Radical Capitalism"

Anonymous said...

Whether the labour are here or in their own countries, the jobs are outsourced to them.

Anonymous said...

After all the outsourcing, Singaporeans do not have to work at all. Joblessness is going to become the way forward, just as in America, where outsourcing is the rage for decades.

Singaproeans can survive just renting out rooms or whole flats, as long as they keep voting PAP, who will build more flats for people to buy and rent out and so on and so forth.

They can then wake up every morning, smell the roses, talk cock in cyberspace, participate in PAP organised activities and senior citizen's activities, bonking with foreigners, oops I mean bonding, and hey, paradise found again.

But, for how long, I cannot predict.

Anonymous said...

But, for how long, I cannot predict.
Anon 11:26 am

I can predict a bit better. As long as the Sinkie opposition is not ready to be govt. But then this for how long, I cannot predict. Can you?

Anonymous said...

As long as the Sinkie opposition is not ready to be govt. But then this for how long, I cannot predict.
Anon 1:33 pm

Ask Teochew Ah Hia or Hainan Ah Ko lah.

And if they don't even know, then which Sinkie knows, u tell me lah?

Matilah_Singapura said...

@1126:

»» just as in America, where outsourcing is the rage for decades. ««

It is now reversed. America is INSOURCING.

The US is on the cusp of an economic BOOM. America has:

1. A wave of innovation i new tech like robotics, 3D printing, nanotech

2. An energy boom due to fracking -- both oil and natural gas

3. VW, BMW, Apple, BASF etc all setting up factories

4. There is about 5 trillion USD sitting offshore by US companies avoiding the punative federal taxes. Once the tax code becomes "friendly" this great swash of CAPITAL is going to come rushing into the continental USA, and they are going to BOOM...even harder.

5. Wages in China, India, Brazil etc (where the US has "outsourced") have increased making it less attractive now to manufacture overseas. So return to the USA (insource) and use robotics.

6. Energy prices high which means the cost shipping goods from overseas manufacturing back to US has risen.

Seems like Singapore also following this "insourcing" model to some degree:

1. Govt is cutting back on overseas emplyment visas

2. Property poised to drop due to restructuring and drop-off of foreign workers

3. Govt has new schemes to ensure local Singaporeans "competitiveness"

4. Call for more local gals to get into the tech sector jobs (today's paper)

So don't sweat it. Just as doom sayers predicted the end of the USA are wrong, so too are those who are saying locals are down and out in Singapore. No, plenty of opportunity. Every reason to CELEBRATE, no reason to be SAD!

Got sunny outlook on life?

Anonymous said...

Yep, plenty of opportunities. 2m jobs created but many sinkies are still jobless and begging for opportunities not for not trying but being discriminated.

Anonymous said...

Regarding the political office out sourcing, RB don't worry lar. Even now they also don't have any real work to do so if out sourced no diff lar

b said...

Outsource or Insource, the people will still vote for the papists.

Anonymous said...

'We can also do away with NS.......'

Good, the Earlier the Better.

Get the Loyal Nepalese Gurkhas to protect Sin and its' Sovereignty. Some Sinkies think they are reliable and patriotic to Sin.

b said...

Forcing people to join NS is like forcing people to join ISIS - they are both wrong.

b said...

Unfortunately, politics is all about power and not about right or wrong.

Anonymous said...

The Great Singapore Mystery

PM Lee is Singapore's champion outsourcer.
So why does he also need so many Ministers?
QUESTION:
Can any Sinkie tell me how many Millionaire Ministers does PM Lee have in his government?

Anonymous said...

With robotics, very soon billions of people in the world will have no jobs.

Then the Governments will create jobs like employing people to dig holes along beaches and filling them up again. Or spend the monay and time to keep people busy thinking of how to rename icons like 'Marina Bay' to 'Marina Bay'.

Anonymous said...

How about creating a new government agency to pick up fish ball sticks?

Anonymous said...

Please do not be too outspoken regarding the PAP. They have done a fantastic job so far and Singaporeans should be more appreciative. Of course they have their shortfalls, which government in the world has not made mistakes. Be grateful for what you have and stop bitching about everything the government implement. What a lot of losers you all are.

Anonymous said...

'Be grateful for what you have and stop bitching about everything the government implement. What a lot of losers you all are."
September 10, 2014 5:41 pm

It is the PAP government who should be grateful for all the votes you receive from Singaporeans.
- so stop bitching about our bitching
- what a lot of overpaid losers you all are

If the PAP government has truly built a robust Singapore ... you should be able to withstand scrutiny and bitching without any problem.
Question is ... have you been working or just overpaying yourselves?

Anonymous said...

They think the people are stupid and simply bitched without thinking. They do not want to know or maybe thinking they have done a fucking good job.

Hear this, you have failed miserably and deserved to be kicked out. No more buts and ifs.

And you are still gloating that you are doing very well and the people must be grateful? See how out of touch you are.

Anonymous said...

'Be grateful for what you have and stop bitching about everything the government implement. What a lot of losers you all are."
September 10, 2014 5:41 pm

PAP is only good for telling Singaporeans to do national service with our time and money.
Singaporeans sacrifice and PAP gets paid big bucks.

Anonymous said...

Wait for the renewed CECA and the whole India sinks into this island. Then you can shout hallelujah.