Hsien Loong and Obama 4 eye meeting. Ampat mata.

What I have written is strictly fictional. It is called humour, ok? It is like turning on the tap for pork soup. Now that you are in the right frame of mind, let me let my imagination runs a little wild, and here it is. In the Oval….

Hsien Loong: ‘Hi BO, I see you got a little problem.’

BarackObama: Sheepishly, not trying to keep his act tough image in his private office, ‘Bad news travels far and wide yah!’

Hsien Loong: ‘No worry. I brought my cheque book along. How much do you need?’

BarackObama: Face lighted up. ‘That’s cool baby. We are so bloke that we can’t even sail a decent size boat to the South China Sea. But we were lucky, as that Captain sailed it into the reef. Embarrassing, so embarrassing!’

Hsien Loong: ‘Heh heh, you should let our boys sail it. We know the ground.’

BarackObama: ‘Yah, you can laugh. The Chinese are laughing too. Damn Marines could not even keep its boat afloat. I think it is safer to sail into Singapore, deep water port, no coral reef to make the Marines looked like Georgie boy.’

Hsien Loong: ‘Again no worry. We will take good care of your boys. We will tow the boat into harbor to make it doubly safe. Our shipyard will fix it like new.’

BarackObama: ‘Thanks a lot. We really appreciate the special relationship we have with Singapore. Now cut it short, how much have you got?’

Hsien Loong put on the biggest smile he could. ‘How much do you need? Fed can print, we can print too.’

BarackObama: ‘As much as you put into Citibank and all the other banks combined. We need to save this F35 project from sinking.’

Hsien Loong: ‘That bad huh?’

BarackObama: ‘The Fed is not going print more money, Congress is not going to approve for more, our bank accounts are empty, the Chinese, the Japanese and the Arabs are not going to buy more T bonds, and we promised the Americans the best aircraft money can buy and a very affordable price tag. Now we don’t have money left to get it off the ground.’

Hsien Loong: ‘What are friends for? Just tell me how much and you can have it.’

BarackObama: ‘You really fixed my problems.’

Hsien Loong: ‘Just a minute. I have a little problem to fix too. After the buying the rotten banks I am now told to be extra careful by Tony. He is the guardian of our reserves and very experience now. He did not want me to put the money down for rotten aircraft like the rotten banks. No haste. The advice of Jim Rogers is invaluable. You know, Tony is the President, and very wise now.’

BarackObama: ‘Oh, tell Tony all is well. No worry, trust US. We have no control over the banks. But for the aircraft, if they don’t fly, we will make sure they fly, 5 years or 10 years later, they will fly. I give you my words.’

Hsien Loong: ‘That’s very assuring. How about two for the price of one?’ And can I pay you in T bonds?