Who’s out in the next GE?

This must be something everyone is guessing and wanting to know. Allow me to pick my list, not in order of merit or demerit of course. The following are likely to miss the next GE. 1. Lee Kuan Yew 2. Goh Chok Tong 3. S Jayakumar 4. Lim Boon Heng 5. Khaw Boon Wan 6. Mah Bow Tan 7. Abdullah Tarmugi 8. S Balaji 9. Chan Soo Sen 10. Yeo Cheow Tong 11. Foo Yee Shoon 12. Ang Mong Seng 13. Charles Chong 14. Lee Bee Wah 15. Seng Han Thong 16. Ong Ah Heng 17. Irene Ng 18. Wee Siew Kim The above 18 will make up about 15% of the current 82 PAP MPs. The percentage seems about right if past election numbers were used for self renewal. Some of the names I throw out here may be a bit startling but given the way things are developing, I think it is a good guess. Or at least this is what the little bird thinks so. OK, I will let you people in on the methodology used for this prediction. I bought two packs of cards and pasted the photos of the MPs onto them. Then I lifted the door of the bird cage and whistled at the birdie. And these were the cards picked. Now if this birdie is as good as the octopus, I will put her up for sale. Should fetch quite a handsome price. I must apologise for thinking of making money all the time.

Selamat Datang

On 24 Sep 10, Singapore welcomed the return of one of its infamous supertalents in Mas Selamat. Although Mas has never achieved anything in his career as a mastermind terrorist, his reputation has been elevated to a cult status. He is a legend in escape that makes David Copperfield looks like a school boy. His skills and talent in planning terrorist acts are second to none. I am not sure about the execution part as he has no opportunity to put this plans to work. He has a knack to be arrested and re arrested after his great escapes from fortress Singapore. The potential of Mas becoming a world famous and successful celebrity is immense. There are many big things lined up for him. The copyright to his story of the great escape is worth millions in books and celluloid. He could become a professor in the academy to lecture on terrorism, and how to escape from prisons, or how to float across a body of water using empty plastic bottles tied to his body. He has also made famous the art of breaking a fall by using toilet rolls. At worst he could set up a security agency to provide security guards. I am going to submit my application to Mas Selamat as his business manager. I will promote his talent world wide and bring him instant fame. He can go on a world circuit to give speeches at US$2000 per head to attend his talks. It is so easy to dramatise his heroics and mind blowing feats as a terrorist. I have not read any reports of what he had done, but he must have done many to his credits. Then no sweat, all I need is to engage a few terrorist experts to endorse his talent and write about them, like a comic book super hero. I hope Mas Selamat is reading this and realise his great potential to be a very rich and famous man. PS. Double posting deleted. I honestly posted once only. It must be his special power that rendered my single post becoming double, like seeing double.

The temptation of Garuda

Hilary has done a great job. The Garuda was seduced by her charms and the lure of power and glory, military hardware and foreign aids, to become a regional power. F-15s, F-16s are on the way. So are frigates, battleships and battle tanks. Of course there will be investments and financial aids too. And Indonesia will be invited to all the grand parties organised by America. There will be more visits to the White House and more photo takings with the President of America. The Indonesian President will have his rightful place beside the infidel President. After the courtship and after being hooked, the hardware will no longer be free. The money from timber and palm oil will be needed to exchange for them in times to come. What would happen to Asean? For decades, Asean grew in strength under the banner of peace, freedom and neutrality. By keeping Asean neutral and staying clear from big power rivalry, Asean was able to carve out a bigger space to manouvre in the international arena. The big powers courted and wooed Asean like a pretty maiden but just enough, fearing that it would push Asean to the embrace of its rival. They treated Asean with tender loving care. No harsh words. What if Asean starts to take sides and sleeps with one of the big powers? When the chips are down, when the cards are open, the battle lines will be drawn. No need for any more niceties. The knives will be out. Will Asean regret the efforts put in all these years to keep the big powers at bay and the freedom to drive its own policies and interests? Or will it enjoy more the opportunities to engage and be full participants in big power conflict? Musharaff and Pakistan are living examples of what will happen when a country traded peace for glory. How would Indonesia transform itself while trying to be a member of Asean and a member of the Muslim brotherhood? Would Indonesia become another Iran, a Pakistan or a Saudi Arabia? And what would Asean become? Or would there still be an Asean?

Amazing Singaporeans

Singaporeans continue to amaze in things they think are normal but bizarre to foreigners. I have previously wrote about how Singaporeans paid millions for a house which they hardly stay but left to the maids and their boyfriends when they visit in the middle of the night or when the owners are at work. Fully furnished and well appointed homes that they paid for through their noses but spending their time elsewhere. The next most costly consumer item in a Singaporean’s expenditure is of course the car. Before buying a car they need to buy a COE, Certificate of Entitlement to buy a car, which will cost between $30k for a small car to $50k for a big car. And the small car will cost easily another $30k for a total cost of at least $60k, not including insurance and road tax. The best part is that Singaporeans are encouraged to part their cars at home and cycle or take public transport to work. And parking in public housing car parks is not cheap either. Maybe I am wrong in that the next most costly expenditure item is the bringing up of a child. It easily costs between $250k for the average hardlanders to bring up a child through university and more than $1m for the well heeled that comes with tuitions and all the perks, plus an overseas degree. And Singaporeans are encouraged to have more children, assuming that they can all afford to cough up this huge sum of money to bring up children. Sure, money is not important to Singaporeans as money is abundant. Another baffling thing that the Singaporeans take for granted is to keep saving in a saving fund that they cannot touch, except for housing and specific needs, till a ripe old age of 62 and above. And they enjoy smiling at the big amount of savings from the monthly statements but barely able to make ends meet in their daily lives. Oh, this one got a best part too. The inflation will find their savings a wasteful effort at the end of the day. And the startling discovery is that despite the big savings, between 40 to 50% of their income, retirement is still a problem to many. Some would have to remortgage their flats or sublet them to keep themselves alive. This is how successful Singaporeans are and in their retirement plans. Oh wait, despite having full employment and needing to import millions of foreign workers, there are Singaporeans still complaining about joblessness. And they are qualified, some are graduates. Amazing indeed. One small secret. Some maids and workers own bigger houses in their home countries than their Singaporean employers.

Indonesia in the big league

The US officially welcomes Indonesia as a member of the big power league with Indonesia rejecting China's stand that the US should not meddle with the territorial disputes in the region. The Indonesian Foreign Minister, Marty Natalegawa, after a meeting with Hilary Clinton in Washington, 'has rejected China's stance that the US stay out of territorial disputes in the South China Sea.' His positive commitment will be rewarded with an audience with President Obama who would probably announce his visit to Indonesia as icing on the cake. With Indonesia openly supporting a US backing for Asean states to negotiate with China, Vietnam already in support of this position, and with Asean's number one military power sure to take the same position, Asean is likely to grow in confidence to thump table with China. China will find it tough handling the most populous Muslim power in the region, back by the US. Marty Natalegawa added that the current row between China and Japan 'reminds all of us that we cannot take for granted the relatively benign atmosphere we've had for many decades now in the Asia Pacific region.' It is time to raise the temperature and have some fun with a little tension and possibly war. Pakistan had many years of peace but found it too uncomfortable. It then invited the US military to have a little fun and the rest is history. Indonesia will be the first recipient of generous military hardware sales to beef up its defence forces to take on China, just in case. And the other Asean states too will queue up to buy more sophisticated American weapons. The US war merchants are salivating with such wonderful opportunities opening up. Soon we will have a militarily strong Asean standing at par with the super powers. Forget about ZOPFAN. That is history. Asean should change its name to SEATO.