4/19/2015

Miracles are happening in Sin City




We are going to see more miracles happening in this city state. We just had one miracle a few weeks ago. Unbelieveable, and more miracles are going to happen. We have self sufficiency in water, which is a near miracle but really not that spectacular. Look at the Garden by the Bay. This is not mere cosmetic piece of white elephant. It has many strategic uses. We plebians with our little knowledge could not see how important this monument is. Please allow me to enlighten you people with the great value in store and how it could create more value than you think.

Last week a miracle happened inside the Garden. They regulated the temperature of the enclosure to simulate winter, probably leading to snow flakes falling. That is not the miracle I am referring to. It is the olive tree. Can you imagine an olive tree flowering and bearing fruits, yes olives, in the equator? This is a miracle for sure.  Nature could not do that, God could not do that or God did not make it so. Olives only bear fruits in temperate countries, not in hot tropical land. And the value of this is that we can be self sufficient in our supply of olives and olive oil. No need to import them from the Mediterranean. We can grow our very own olives in large scale production.

This is only the beginning. Think of the juicy apples and oranges, the pears and the succulent strawberries. Miracles can happen everyday in the Garden. What, you can buy an olive for 20c a piece in Fairprice? What, an apple for 50c?

Come on, miracles are priceless. Not the same. The Tourist Board should rename the Garden as Miracle Garden and sure to attract more visitors. Come and see a miracle. Miracles do happen now and then.

PS. How much does it cost to produce that miracle olive?

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

There are no succulent strawberries in Singapore or anywhere in the world. And the strawberry is a pseudo berry.

Matilah_Singapura said...

"Miracles" and "Magic" (they are both the same damn thing) are ideas which the mystical supernaturalists adhere to. i.e. there are no "miracles" or "magic".

The more rational of us know that it is science which brings about the ability to transcend the limits imposed by nature---not in total, but in small, limited contexts. We also can do this shit to save and enhance lives, or to also destroy the live of people we don't like, or...the best reason of all...to ENTERTAIN us.

Why the fuck are you putting down Gardens By The Bay? The bloody thing is AWESOME lah.

The thing is already paid for. white elephant or not, better go and use it lah. Maybe can take cover here and there and get a blowjob, use selfie stick to take photo, and proudly show your friends.

Hey man, dun knock it...when I was younger, I used to get a kick from having "public sex"....handjob in bus and taxi, sex in movie theatre, blowjob and full sex in changing room at stores like Robinson's and Metro, fucking in Botanic Gardens and Alkaff Mansion...all this in Singapore lah. Who says this place is boring?

Anyway, its a "miracle" I never got caught ;-)

Anonymous said...

But the miracle can happen only in the Garden enclosure lah. How big is the enclosure, u tell me lah?

U think PAP can make a miracle in the whole of little red dot of Sinkieland?

If can, then we don't have to worry about the haze anymore, tio bo? And that will be a miracle.

Anonymous said...

PAP should make an enclosure over the whole of Sinkieland. Then, besides keeping the haze out and controlling air quality, can even simulate the 4 seasons like in temperate countries for Sinkies to enjoy.

Anonymous said...

Yes, yes. If only they could build a couple of nuclear plants to provide the energy to regulate the temperature.

Anonymous said...

Sand-nado - Beijing Battered By Blanket Of Red Dust

SOURCES:
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2015-04-17/sand-nado-beijing-battered-blanket-red-dust

With this type of living conditions in Beijing and the rest of China.
PRC students should be paying Singaporeans to be allowed to study in Singapore.
Singaporeans should not need to have to give away money to entice PRC students to study here.

But if we have a Pro Alien Government, then of course Singaporeans must pay for everything lah!
True or not?
You tell me lah!

Anonymous said...


如果在这里不是天堂, 哪里是天堂 !

I really enjoy living in this
very crowded tiny city state.

Everyday is very exciting and is
very interesting!

Everyday there are fresh news and
new "miracles"!

Cheers.

Anonymous said...

Miracles of Lee Kuan Yew (Parody)
-------------------
CPF
- Money that belongs to Yew.
- Can see but cannot touch until you die
- cannot be used to buy food for your family

Singapore Reserves
- an enormous sum of money
- so gargantuan in size that it requires 65 man-years to tally
- like the unicorn, it has never been seen by most Singaporeans.

Anonymous said...

Miracles of Lee Hsien Loong (Parody)
-------------------
Created a Swiss standard of living for Aliens in Singapore.

Anonymous said...

Matilah, dont anyhow use other peoples' photo can ? This one sudah Mati lah ! You not scared he bring you along ah ?

Anonymous said...

Definition of a Military Government:
-------------------------
A military government is generally any government that is administrated by military forces, whether this government is legal or not under the laws of the jurisdiction at issue, and whether this government is formed by natives or by an occupying power.

Types of military government include:

1. Military occupation of acquired foreign territory and the administration thereof

2. Martial law, temporary military rule of domestic territory

3. Military junta, extralegal rule of a country by military committee, usually after a coup d'état

4. Military dictatorship, an authoritarian government controlled by a military and its political designees

5. Stratocracy, a government traditionally or constitutionally run by a military

With so many generals and admirals.
Is the PAP government also a military government?

Matilah_Singapura said...

@617:

>> Matilah, dont anyhow use other peoples' photo can ?

Cannot. I must try.

Anonymous said...

More Parody & Jokes
------------
Just finished watching Captain America movie on Channel 5.
We have a better movie.
Brigadier General Singapore.
Able to arrest a 16 year old boy with a single police report.

“Hail Hard Truths!
Immortal Hard Truths!
We shall never be destroyed!
Cut off one lie and two more shall take its place!
We serve the Supreme Hard Truths, as the world shall soon serve us!”

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/hail-hydra

Anonymous said...

The Greatest Miracle that has already happened is the showing of the 8-minute Youtube Clip by the prodigy child actor Amos Yee on the Demise of LKY at a very timely occasion.

Anonymous said...

The Tourist Board must have prepared all the notes for the tourist guides to showcase the beautiful tulips and strawberries and apples and pears to the European and Chinese tourists.

Anonymous said...

The Olive is a symbol of Peace.


If this can be taken as a good omen, then it means Sinkies are going to have peace of mind in the near future.

Or it could also mean that the PAP is going to MAKE Peace with the Opposition Parties.

And the only way PAP is going to make Peace with the Opposition Parties is when the PAP can no longer form the government without the other Political Parties' help.

If that happens, yes, it is going to be a real Miracle.

Peace for Sinkies, Peace for the People, without the Action Party. Just the People.

As some jokers have said, LKY look after Sinkaporeans very well. Implying that his son does not look after the People very well.

Now LKY can rest in peace. Don't need to jump out of the coffin. Anyway he kena burnt to ashes by his loving children and dear grand children already. How to jump here or jump there? Even if they make a Statue for him, he still could not jump here and jump there lah.

Three cheers for Sinkapore.
Three cheers for Sinkies.
Peace of Mind will finally be with you

Anonymous said...

If Lee Kuan Yew Statues are built in Sin, they need to be fences up or guarded.
Otherwise extra cleaners shall be needed as rotten egg, stone, human and dog shits or at the minimum spits will be thrown at them on top of curses.

Of course, tourists will be attracted to see the statues and the antics happening around them.