I’ll be damned to even be talking about white racism. There is no such thing as white racism. The only racists are the Asians and Africans, who are very good at calling the angmohs bad names. I believe many Singaporeans will be waiting to rubbish my comments about a non existence white racism. It is a bogeyman.
The whites are the most loving and compassionate people in this world. They are the champions of human rights, causes against aborigines, against animals, against weak nations and victims of oppression. That’s why the rest of the world love them and often reminisce the time when they had to call them masters. All have great stories about how well they were treated by their white masters. Singaporeans too like to heap praises on the whites as benevolent rulers. And the Asean countries are begging the Americans to stay on to be their ruler.
Some may think I am being cynical. Let’s face it, and I heard it in the elite circles, the world will not be what it is today without the great white man. They have liberated the world and brought about great progress for human kind. They have liberated the natives and aborigines from their wigwams and grass huts in America, Australia and New Zealand. Can’t imagine the pathetic state these countries would be without the white man.
And they have made sports a great event and fun event. They even abolished the old rules that only white man can play golf and tennis. Without the white man’s bravery and sense of justice to abolish such racist rules, Tiger Woods would not have the opportunity to play golf and be a world champion.
And for that privilege, he hired a white man to be his caddie for 13 years and probably made his caddie a very rich man. And you can see how happy his caddie was when carrying his bags. And every time Woods made a good shot, the caddie would be hugging him for the world to see. There was definitely no racial barrier when the white caddie had to call a black man master. The caddie loved his job and Wood’s colour was never an issue.
The caddie must have many fond memories of serving Woods. He too reminisces the good times when Woods was his master. And a few day’s back, while celebrating his award in Shanghai, in high spirit, he said, ‘It was my aim to shove it right up that black….hole’. And they roared in approval of such a great joke. It was really fun when everything said was for fun, with no bad intention. He would have sworn that all his 13 years with Woods, such a thought had never occurred to him. The evening was just a party and it was all in jest.
We have almost one page of articles on this remark by Steve Williams in the Sunday Times. Why is everyone so excited and agitated by what Williams said? Can’t people accept an innocent joke? Perhaps silly Asians got no sense of humour. And it is good that Williams teach them a bit about how to crack a joke.
Let me try one also. The headlines of all sports media used to have things like ‘Chasing the Tiger’, ‘Tigers the one to beat’, ‘Gunning for the Tiger’, whenever Tiger Woods was in the chase for a golf title. Let me try to imagine the next headline in the media when Tiger Woods is competing. ‘Going for the black….hole’. I don’t know what the 4 full stops meant. I just copied from the media on what Steve Williams said.
Come on you silly Asians, it is only a white joke. Have a little sense of humour. No need to work the small stuff. Definitely no Freudian slip. Peace, peace.