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10/27/2011

Stretching Cheryl Lee’s plea

Cheryl’s main contention is that mother should spend more time with their children. This is only natural, and nature makes it that way. The mother bears to baby and cares for the baby. In the process, there is that bond between mother and child, a natural instinct, that will keep them as mother and child for life. The added advantages are many, psychological and social, and the imparting of knowledge, values and human kindness. And there is this thing called mother’s love. I know, some claims that limited quality time can replace all the time a mother can provide for the child. Good if one believes in it.

Our society has been structured to become one that is more like an empty nest. The catchphrase of three generation families, or family is the core unit of our society, is only as good as farting, meant to be spoken but not taken seriously.

Our children are meant to fend for themselves like in the 50s and 60s. In those days poverty was compounded by ignorance and there were many children running around while their parents had to earn a living. But it was not that bad as it is today. Many mothers still stayed at home to look after the brood of children.

The society today is one that demands both parents to be working. Those ignoramuses who still argued that it is a matter of choice, that the govt did not force anyone to work or to buy HDB flats they cannot afford, please go and jump into the longkangs. The system has been designed to empty the incomes of the workers. HDB flats are prices to be affordable by two incomes for 30 years. Or like Patriot said, if you have $300, you must have the freedom to spend it in one meal or in 20 or 30 meals. This is not true. You are dictated by the govt on how that money is to be spent through their housing policies and mean testing in hospitals.

But that would not be too bad if the Ah Kongs and Ah Mahs could stay home to look after the children. After all we are encouraging a three tiered family under one roof. That is not to be. Ah Kong and Ah Mah now must work to earn their own pocket money, to have some dignity, to live life to the fullest, by cleaning tables and washing plates. Do the oldies have the energy to spend time loving their grandchildren after a hard day’s work?

The poor child will be left at home, alone or with the maids, through their growing up years. Don’t blame them if they grow up and become queer or devoid of human values and kindness. They are not brought up in a proper home despite the affluence in material well beings. They have their all the toys, computers, iphones and ipads but no mother or grandparents to be with them.

Is it a matter of choice? Please, don’t deceive yourself. It is how the society is being structured. It is the new value, the new normal, an empty nest is ok. Both parents and grandparents are expected to work till dead. Where got time for the precious children? Who says the children are precious? They are meant to be digits for the workforce. Our country need more children not because we love them, but we need them to ensure economic growth.

See the light?

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Where got room for the grandparents to live with their grandchildren? Each single room costs about 100ks or more leh.
How many family make 4ks or more on average?

digitzen

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

Hi digitzen, welcome to the blog.

I think you are living in a different world. The latest DBSS launch at Clementi with 4rm and 5rm priced $530K to $650k and $658k to $770k and everyone saying that it is worth it, $100k more is no problem.

Singaporeans are really rich, or foolish to have to pay so much for a 99 yr flat.

Anonymous said...

DBSS = Don't Be So Stupid

Anonymous said...

Mr Bean;

Do You see the light now?
Singaporeans are rich!

I see Audi, BMW and Mercedes
everywhere, i see condos all
over the island. And i see
long queues at restaurants, at expos and trolleys loaded with
imported stuff.

I see elderly folks drinking
beer and smoking away talking
about meimeis at cofi shops
early in the morning.

Singaporeans are living in
paradise, literally.

You got it?

digitzen

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

Hi digitzen,

Yes Sinkies are very rich, just like the Americans, buy and pay with future income. What's the problem? Make sure no recession and income is steady for the next 30 years.

And don't worry about savings for retirement not enough.

agongkia said...

Hehe..I like Cheryl's idea of spending more time with children.
But where to find such wife here nowadays?
Look for a wife that is willing to spent time at home.Not the type that like to compare their hubby's status or earning or the type of flat they stay.Those working mothers should pay a price if they work because they prefer more luxury.
I only support those working mum who work because of circumstances or those who really need to supplement the family income.

It is not the duty of Ah Kong and Ah Mah to look after the grandchildren?How much do the children gave their parent monthly for taking care of the children?Can only employ maids,drive big cars and go for holidays.Many even kick their parent out because of the wife.

Time to spent more time with children and teach them the right value.
Nothing wrong to stay in a 3 room flat.I sleep in the park and 5 foot way sometimes.
Dun depend too much on the Garmen or blame the society because it is run by many whose parent did't spent much time with them when they were young.
Be contented.Blame the parent themselves.

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

Hi agongkia, this is the beginning of the rot when family life breaks down.

Anonymous said...

Think too much...old fashion way of thinking,want government support lifestyle u prefer is not fair to rest.who don't want spent more time with kids? Who don't want everything cheap,good& suit us? But find us a country who can give comfortable lifestyle then here,once u name it,u can go there,few yr later tell us how it is

Anonymous said...

Still didn't get it do you? The govt is controlling all the resources and dictating the life of the people.

If the people think this is the way to go, then shut up and live with it. If the people think this is not the way to go, they should voice out.

No one is asking govt to support their lifestyle. The people are telling the govt this is how they want to live and change its policies, not the other way round.

The govt says it is listening, and it is the duty of the people to tell the govt. The people must decide what they want, not what the govt wants.

Anonymous said...

The Government again !

How can the people rely
on the government.
Have a backbone to make
change when needed.

Why keep begging for mercy ?

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

The people are not asking govt for mercy. The people are telling the govt what they want.

The govt can continue to be arrogant and dictate to the people. The people knows that they have the power to cast their votes and come 2016, things can be different.

Who is master who is servant?

Anonymous said...

Agongkia is right!

There is nothing more invalueable than kinship, those made of your blood.
One can have the Whole World but, there will be no happiness if one loses the love and respect from close ones such as the elders, siblings, children/grandchildren and neighbours.
And it will be very sad if the kins care not about YOU! It will be the greatest failure of ones' life.

patriot

Anonymous said...

It will be terrible plus horrible when sickly elderlies are abandoned.
This could be due to their own impropriety when they were young or their failure to care for their families.
At national level, the leaders must never be liked tyrants and dictators that their fellow countrymen long to remove them. It is so tragic to see these leaders causing hardship to their people. Nothing is more tragic than to see what happened to Gadaffi, his son and his general. Can anything be more vexatious than celebrating the death of the people of their national leaders ?

Anonymous said...

"Can anything be more vexatious than celebrating the death of the people of their national leaders ?"
should read:
"Can anything be more vexatious than the people celebrating the death of their national leader after killing him ?"
I tender my apology.

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

Sending our oldies to the workplace instead of enjoying their time with the grandchildren is breaking up the family bonding.

When a society is always thinking of money and material well being, this is how it will be.

Anonymous said...

It is acknowledged that even dying men cry for their mothers before death (battlefield, etc). In S'pore, the new generation will cry for their Indon/Pinoy maids.

Anonymous said...

No lah, Singaporeans will swear at themselves for being born to poor parents.

Anonymous said...

Many will blame their parents for been poor and lowly educated.