Stupid Bank

My friend related this incident to me. His rich Malaysian client came to Singapore to open a joint account with his daughter. The client has already an account in this stupid bank. You know what? They made him wait for two hours before attending to him. He got so frustrated that he even closed his existing account and went to another local bank to open his account. And the service was simply swift and efficient. The stupid bank simply lost a big customer and not only that, its bad service will be spread by this client to his friends. And better still, this stupid bank is in the process of doing something unproductive, like checking on old records of clients and if the photocopies of ICs in their record are not to their liking they are asking their clients to make another copy for their records. They think the clerks in the banks have nothing useful to kill time but their high net worth clients will have time to take the trouble to make photocopies of ICs to send to the stupid bank. Instead of doing business or making things easy for its clients, it chose to irritate clients with its stupidity and arrogance. Ridiculous but the stupid bank will claim that it is efficiency and the right thing to do.


Wally Buffet said...

First off, your friend's "rich" Malaysian client may not be that rich after all. Millionaires in Singapore are a dime a dozen.

Every Sinkapoorean, well almost, has assets of at least a few millions plus or minus a couple of hundred thousands. The HDB is worth $700,000 and still climbing. The Beamer $350,000 plus with an embedded coe value that is also appreciating in value with every bid. Stocks, shares, derivatives etc. will easily bring it up another $500,000. And this is just a typical average Joe. Think about all the well paid honchos and "entrepreneurs" and assorted villains.

So the "rich" Malaysian in question is just another average walk in customer if you factor in his Dinggits at 2.38
dinggits to one S$. Should I be surprised at the reception he got as I understand most truly rich Malaysians, Indonesians and assorted third world upper crass always get whisked into our country's private banks via a private entrance and served exquisite fragrant rare Chinese tea before hunkering down to discuss about their strategic "investments".

C'mon Mr. Bean, your friend's "rich" Malaysian client must know that this is a very rich country so a little "rich" is not rich enough.

As for the other bank, I can only say that they don't have much business to begin with and thus is bootlicking every two bit "rich" customer who walks in with a doggy bag of pennies.

Hehe Good Morning Bro.


Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

I have a very rich Singaporean client. He owned several properties, flourishing biz, and millions in cash! He came to my office in canvas shoes, not the branded stuff, short sleeve shirt not tucked in and speaking in Hokien. My stupid young credit officer asked for a list of his properties to prove his worth: )

BTW I heard this guy who went to the stupid bank is something like that, not wanting to show his wealth.

Whatever, the other bank is just as big and doing very fine. And it is bad to treat your customers badly. And this stupid bank is well known for treating its customers badly and very bad service.

Anonymous said...

You think everyone must worship the god of fortune!
Rich man or poor man, they are all customers lah.
WTF! You do believe there are lesser beings too hah!

Wally Buffet said...

Next time, tell your friend's "rich" Malaysian client to bank with a private bank. He will get all the attention he rightfully deserve.

Also, that "rich" Hokkien gentleman in working street garb should just call your Senior Vice President and arrange a meeting with your goodself present. This will boost your standing with the company and at the same time give your Hokkien friend a boost to his self esteem. Who knows, he might like to dress better the next time around.

In both instances, these "rich" tycoons will get their just "desserts" of respect and sterling service to win their business and thus boost those organisations' bottom line.

Frankly, if I were that rich which is a pipe dream considering that I ain't that business savvy anymore, I will not talk to anyone below the rank of a vice president because the business I am giving is no "peanuts".


Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

There are many very rich individuals who are very happy with looking just like anyone on the street. They don't see the need to please the salesmen or salesgirls by their branded accessories.

agongkia said...

My poor friend help his bankrupt friend bought a van under his company's name.When the bankrupt friend cannot pay up,poor friend has to clear the instalment till he himself got problem.Vehicle being towed away and they wrote to him to pay up or force sale.,saying that the balance is about 2k plus.Friend pay up 1.5 K and instead of getting back his vehicle with the intention to pay the balance ,was told that the van was sold for 2.5k.
They refuse to give a bank closing statement and just said that the case is close.
Not stupid bank but a bully yellow bank.
Another bank has a ghost account number on the receipt and my poor and goondu friend deposit cash in it and even has his vehicle towed away after depositing..After 1 year plus,he then realise from one responsible officer that they will not be able to identify who deposit money into this account.My goondu friend LL lost an unknown money just like that as the receipt,even he has,was unable to read.
MAS..Mana ada system?Bank should be given grade A,B,C,D and E

Wally Buffet said...

Err Ah Gong,

It's not the fault of the MAS lah. Where they can monitor such trifle goings on at the retail banking floor?

For us little customers, I always go to the POSB bank to do my banking. The staff is very helpful especially to senior citizens. I don't even need to queue sometimes when they see me feeling faint standing in line.

POSB, my favourite bank!

Anonymous said...

I got an account with a state-owned bank but run out of deposit. The kind bank billed me service charges as well as reminder to close my account if it remained inactive. LL got to close the account.
When, I was young in the 50s, it even accepted my stamps as deposit and gave me interests though it was just a few dollars.
What the hell has happened?
I got a millionaire look and each time I go into a bank to get some coolings from their aircons, the sweet pretty staff always approach me without fail. I was always sorry to disappoint them but more sorry that I cannot afford to be their customers.

Matilah_Singapura said...

Please name the bank. You'll be doing everyone a great service.

Anonymous said...

All banks in Sin have implemented similar cartel like practices, such is the prevailing practice, so the Bank I mentioned is the same as all other banks in Sin now.
Except the Bank was once the people Bank with many branches all over Sin. Now it had reincarnated into the largest bank in Sin.

Wally Buffet said...

POSB, the bank for you and me.

This is the bank I grew up with.

Never mind if it's the little man's bank because the service is simply marvelouse.

Like Ah Gong said, in an age long long ago and far far away, it even accepted postage stamps as money deposits. But we have to move with the times. That guy who ran the little man's bank is now history and in his place, we have a foreign talent bringing with him a wealth of banking experience to make banking a pleasure for all of us little folks.

POSB, the Big Bank for Little Ones.

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

You called all the long queues good service? Pay a visit to UOB, OCBC or Citi and see how fast they serve you then you know what is good and efficient service.

When queuing in a bank is no difference from queuing to buy 4D I don't call that good service.

Wally Buffet said...


As a senior citizen,I don't need to queue lah.

And the UOB, OCBC and Citi also got to queue man. You bank in Raffles place sure fast one because central business district mah.

Try to go to heartlands and see. All the same lah. But POSB can open account with 500 dollars. The other three especially the foreign one will only accept a bigger amount if I am not mistaken. Anyways, as an average Joe, I prefer to bank with the People's bank, solidly backed by TH which is the mother of the mother holding company.


Anonymous said...

Rich man would not go to POSB lah! Malu, they say!

Rich man only bank with Citibank, HSBC etc.

Poor man would not step into Citibank or HSBC. The wealth in the air is overwhelming, standing next to the rich.

Poor man rather queue in poor man's bank like everyone else. It is comforting in like company.

Wally Buffet said...

Well said man.

No wonder I feel sooooo comfortable queuing in the POSB bank.

The sweet young thing will come over and say, "Uncle, you no need queue lah, I bring you go teller."

All I can do is to open my big mouth wide and say, "WOW, superb service!"


Anonymous said...

Nowadays, hard to find a rich guy not wanting to show his colours lah!

No more can you find guys like the legendary 'Hoo Thye' boss, going around in shorts, singlets and slippers and travelling in trishaws or on foot.

The world changes. It used to be that, if you have it, hide it.

Now they are shouting, if you have it, flaunt it! Those with mullahs will sing the chorus to that.

Matilah_Singapura said...

anon 251

> Rich man would not go to POSB lah! Malu, they say! <

Haha. "rich" is defined by the amount in your bank balance, not which bank you use.

POSB has the lowest fees of all, and it is all over the island.

I like the POSB. They are my friends.

Wally Buffet said...

When you're in the middle of nowhere and needs some money to buy a packet of condom from seven eleven, your best bet is a POSB atm machine, not UOB, OCBC or the aneh bank, Citic.

Whip out your IPAD, go to Google maps, look for POSB atms and presto, there is one to your left and one to your right just hidden behind some bushes.

What a life saver!



agongkia said...

postage stamp as deposit not posted by me lah.Being a country bumpkin,I was told by teacher to buy stamps and pasted it on some dun know cards.
They did not collect it back.Till I finish PSLE I still have cards with stamp on it and dun know what is the purpose,just do what the teacher said.
I am so guilty to my parent for being so gong.,exchanging their hard earn money for stamps.Till today its still a secret.

Matilah_Singapura said...

Better still, POSB ATM card can be used all over the world.

... but the best part I like -- the low low fees, nicely subsidised by the stylo-milo's who are customers of DBS.

DBS enjoys a big fat user base with POSB, but it has to "subsidise" POSB customers.

I like that.

Welfare banking :-)

Matilah_Singapura said...

I would like to second Wally's kudos to POSB's service. I have never had any problems. Their on-line portal has kept me very satisfied -- I haven't stepped foot in S'pore in nearly 3 years, yet my account works superbly even here in Oz.

I want to find out anything, I just call up, and my query is usually solved under 10 mins. Try to get that shit to happen in Aust. Firstly, some dude from India or the Philippines answers the phone :-((
...And fees -- Aust banks are motherfuckers when it comes to charging fees.

Nah, give me the little man's POSB anyday. I've had accounts with the "hi profile" Boat Quay/ Raffles Place banks -- unless you are trading or buying gold forget it or borrowing shit-loads of money, forget it.

For me, where personal banking is concerned, POSB:

the People's Ordinary Socialist Bank!

Anonymous said...


Voices from the hearts of the average Joes. Most have positive images of POSB including me. Good thing they did not get rid of the POSB brand, and somehow it is still surviving. Started in 1877, it is considerably older than all the other local banks.

Truth be told, banking with them is convenient, with branches everywhere and stand alone ATMs in every nook and corners.

Sure, some days the crowds can be long and slow moving. But at least they treat rich and poor alike.

By the way, waiting for two hours is rather unbelievable and possibly exaggerated.

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

No exaggeration my fren. This is not a man of exaggeration. He may be off plus or minus 10 mins.

It smacks of pure arrogance for any organisation to make their customers wait for more than 30 mins. But sheep are used to being treated like sheep and do not know what is good service and what they should deserve for bringing business to an organisation.

The fuck heads who called himself CEOs or whatever Os better come down and shake the hands of their customers. But abusing Singaporeans is the norm, no one wanted anything more or expect anything betterer.

Anonymous said...

I am always fighting stupidity in the office. Recently a high net worth client wanted to open a separate account and submitted his particulars.

The support staff refused to open another acct for him coz his copy of ic in his file of 15 years was not good enough for him. The staff insisted that the client submit another copy of his ic. This stupid staff may have all the time in the world to inspect ics, but the high net worth clients have many better things to do than to be troubled by an old copy of ic. And this stupid staff wanted to wave his power to make the high net worth client dance to his whims and fancy.

Such staff would probably chase away more customers than anything else. Only stupid organisations keep such stupid staff.