4/08/2011

The people crunchers

One train broke down in the morning peak hour and 17,500 commuters were stranded. In the same time many were enjoying an orgy or a sauna bath in the packed trains. These will be the things to come as we happily plod along mindlessly to allow the population to grow irresponsibly. We are 5 m and going to 6m and more. Heh heh. And it will not stop and cannot be stopped as any attempt to do so will slow down our economic growth. The numbers will keep going up and the rock will become more vibrant. And everyone can look forward to 10% or 15% economic growth and big bonuses. One man will be extremely happy. The trains and buses will eventually turn into people crunchers as we continue to progress down the road. It will be a happy adventure to all the rich citizens, travelling in style and comfort, with a sauna or orgy thrown in every now and then. We are progressing nicely to the future of graceful living and lifestyle.

6 comments:

Wally Buffet said...

Long long ago in a little country life was quiet and peaceful and the metro trains were equally as unhurried.

From Tampines to Jurong, one could easily fall asleep, from the ding donging chime of doors closing at a leisurely pace, by the fifth station.

Ah the Singapore of yesteryear. How nostalgic.

Now, if my car broke down and it has never done so touch wood, and I had to go somewhere, I'll rather walk there thank you. Taking a taxi when I can afford it is no better. The ex PMET will go into a hysterical rant about life in Singapore and generally my trip would be a journey into unsolicited diatribe country.

I hate the smell of BO and crushing bodies in our subway trains not to mention the incessant chatter of monkeys of different species.

Of course in other cities, the crushing crowd is omnipresent but at least the cool climate and the homogenous population makes it less nauseating.

Anonymous said...

"It will be a happy adventure to all the rich citizens, travelling in style and comfort". Unquote.
You're certainly rite here, the rich citizens never ever need to be crunched and they do not crunch others either. Whatever happens to others is not their business. You starve, you cry, you die all your business, they're never responsible for your situations.

Anonymous said...

Wait till they tell you that world class experience in Tokyo subway and that it is a must to have experience. Priceless!

Matilah_Singapura said...

Relax folks -- the Japanese have people employed to 'assist' commuters onto trains during peak hours. And they all arrive at work, neat and groomed despite the daily crush on the train.

Big cities hum along and problems of crowding are dealt with eventually. You cannot have the benefits of a huge productive population without willing to adjust yourself. There is no 'free lunch'.

When the transport system is working to capacity at peak periods, you can conclude that there is a lot of productivity going on, and that is the driver of wealth.

So thank your lucky stars that there are people on the buses and trains in the peak periods: that means lots of JOBS -- at a time where increasing numbers of people are losing their jobs and entire businesses.

Anonymous said...

Same as Japan, but different kind of weather, providing the sweat before they board the trains, and giving bacteria on bodies to fester, giving the inside of the train the unique Stinkapore smell.

Matilah_Singapura said...

I think yo are expecting too much if you cannot 'tahan' a little body odour once just for a short trip. Afterall, you are not the only person on this earth – there are other too, travelling with you who also have 'important things to do' – just like you.

Just be thankful that naughty schoolboys are not having farting contests in the trains during peak hour.

Complaining about crowds in densely populated cities is like cursing at god because you don't like the weather – no purpose is served. Machines occasionally fail – if you depend on machines that's just one of the things you have to accept – or drive yourself insane.

Imagine if you had no trains or buses. Then what? Cycle or walk to work?

You also have the option of booking door-to-door service with a taxi. Or getting a private vehicle. If those options are 'too expensive' then it boils down to a 'money problem' for you (not the rest of the world), not the fault of the public transportation itself.

C'mon lah. Don't be a baby.