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11/12/2006

myth 92

'I am generous and all caring' I am going to set up a charity with a fund of $10 million to help the needy. These people really need help and if no one is going to help them they can all become jumpers. Now conditions to qualify for my generosity. 1. They must come forward and apply, giving all details of their family background, father, mother, grandfather, grandmother, brothers and sisters, husband and wives and children. And they must bring along all their bank statements showing how many bank accounts they have and how much each have in their accounts. 2. The family income must not exceed $800 or $300 per person. I have worked this out in detail how much one needs to live. 4 packets of instant noodles and 4 packets of 3 in 1 tea or coffee shall make a wonderful meal for a day. That will cost 60c + 10c multiply by 4 meals or $2.80 x 30 days. A sum of $84 a month. $300 a month is thus more than enough. 3. For married couple, must have only one child. With such a high cost of living it is better that they limit themselves to only one child. Otherwise there is really nothing my fund can do to help. 4. They must live on rental properties. 5. And there must be no colour tv or refrigerator or hi fi at home. and no handphone. These are luxury. Computer is definitely out of question. 6. Another condition is that they must be out of jobs for at least 6 months. 7. And they must not turn down any jobs offer to them. 8. Better still if they have IOUs or statements from the loansharks to prove that they are deeply in debt. 9. And when they come to apply, try to look poor and hungry. Fat or chubby applicants need not apply. I think that should be enough criteria to qualify for my charity fund. And if successful, each one will be given $100 a month. This will be given to them on a 3 monthly basis and every case will be reviewed after 3 months. I can't give them too much or my fund will dry up fast. And now it has been a year and my fund is still not utilised. There are some applicants but most of them cannot qualify. Never mind, one day someone will qualify. Anyone want to apply?

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