3/17/2015

The cardboard Policemen

Many of you must have heard of the story of tying an elephant with a thin piece of rope to a flimsy piece of stick on the ground. And yes, the elephant would not try to walk away, believing that it would be a vain attempt. It tried furiously when young, tied with strong chain that would not give way. Now conditioned, the elephant still remembers the experience and would not waste any effort to break loose.

The cardboard policemen is an ingenious idea to keep Singapore safe. And this is particularly effective given the conditioning of the Sinkies over 5 decades that they even believe that they are daft, that their life long savings do not belong to them, that they are paying good money, hundreds of millions to the most talented individuals to rule them. And they have been conditioned to fear the authority, the men in blue. A cardboard policeman will do the trick to maintain law and order. Cheap and good.

And the facts cannot be denied. Soon we can expect the authority to come up with a string of statistics to show how crime rate has fallen because of the appearance of the cardboard policemen. And they even have the pleasure to choose a nice looking one, not a fearless Rambo that would kick butts, to instil fear, just a sweet looking guy will do the trick.

With the cardboard policemen on duty, the Police Force could easily increase in numbers by several divisions, each cardboard policeman costing a few dollars, and would work 7/24 all 365 days of the year, tirelessly. Chee Hean can tell the police chief, how many men do you need, just tell me and you can have them. Give the man a tiger, and a medal for this great idea. See, Singaporeans are so easy to be kept away from making trouble. I think, till to date, not a single cardboard policeman has been disfigured, stolen, damaged or burnt. Just make sure the female fans would not bring them home to adore. That is probably the only risk faced by the cardboard policemen.

I am not sure how the foreigners would react to the cardboard policemen. Would they giggle at the sight of one, would they pee on it, or would the lusty ones use them for self gratification? I think this is a small price to pay for such an effective policing force that is practically free, maintenance free, no training required.

Welcome to the land of the cardboard Police Force. Oh, just a note of caution. This concept is only applicable to Singapore and to police Sinkies. Don’t think it will work in other countries. The requirement is decades of conditioning, driving fear into the heads of the daft Sinkies, that the sight of a cardboard policeman will keep them away from crime.

Did anyone say more crimes are committed by Sinkies and not by foreigners? If that is true, then the cardboard policemen are ineffective against Sinkies but effective against foreigners. Now, which is which?

If this concept can be extended to soldiering, we can scrap NS totally. Would that be nice?

32 comments:

Matilah_Singapura said...

Crime rate is a function of CULTURE and also of how "intelligent" the man-made laws are. i.e. if you have too many STUPID laws (every cuntry has them), then you will make many innocent people "criminals", simply for minding their own business and doing what they do privately.

Actually the thing which impresses my foreign friends is the foot patrols of heavily armed soldiers and police at Changi Airport. Changi airport is where most of the foreigners tend to be :-)

Anonymous said...

- Cardboard policeman.
- Paper Generals.
- Absentee politicians in parliament.
- CPF money that is not our money.
- HDB flats that don't belong to us ... but we still have the highest home "ownership" in the world

Everything is wayang in Singapore.

Anonymous said...


anonymous 9.56am pls note.....

I like your comment that
"Everything is wayang"!

Life is actually a Wayang!

You have to wayang thru life!

NO CHOICE! NO CHOICE!

Very often, it is how you wayang in life that dictates your survival!

NO CHOICE! NO CHOICE!

Cheers.

Veritas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

....driving fear into the heads of the daft Sinkies, that the sight of a cardboard policeman will keep them away from crime.
RB

Tiok. And with the same fear driving into the heads of the 60% voters by the PAP, that the sight of even the strongest Sinkie opposition will keep them away from voting opposition.

Anonymous said...

There is a price in this. A hell lot of civil service functions are outsource to keep cost down.
Veritas 11:13 am

But despite this, PAP can still win at least 93% seats every election, even in worse times for Sinkies than now. So did PAP paid the price in this?

Veritas said...

The reason for so many auxiliary police and so many functions of former civil services outsourced is because we may not be able to afford their salary.

Fucking Kuan yew may have ask some fucking white man consultancy like (maybe) vampire Goldman Sachs to come out a scheme to make civil service a backstabbing war zone.

First civil service implement a ranking design design to fire 10% of maverick every year, using the pretext of non-performing. Those who stay behind are rewarded handsome salary, beyond the wildest dreams. Within a night, our civil service become a den of high pay cock sucker, and harem of eunuch and concubine

Kuan Yew then brag he make civil servie attract talent.

The bad thing is our civil service employ very little people compared to elsewhere.

I saw Tharman presentation bragging that Singapore spend little on public servant, meanwhile PAP brag civil service pay good.

There is a price in this. A hell lot of civil service functions are outsource to keep cost down.

Today, we hire auxillary police from Malaysia.

All these jobs could have been created for Singaporeans.

Anonymous said...

How about cardboard LKY for Tanjong Pagar GRC?
Like that can win elections or not?

PM Lee always saying he is looking for talent for PAP.
Why not just put up cardboard PAP old guards?
Cardboard PAP old guard will generate good feelings for redbean but will not ask PM Lee too many troublesome questions in parliament.

Well paid and stupid.
Are these the ideal qualities PM Lee is looking for in his PAP MPs?

agongkia said...

I am a law abiding citizen so such cardboard is not applicable to me...
However I would prefer to see cardboard MP.Not military policeman but my constituency MP.

Hardly have a chance to see him.
Would be good to see such cardboard with his friendly face and some encouraging words like..
..Do not vote blindly.....for a better future...

Anonymous said...

cardboard LKY in Aljunied GRC ?
- reminding voters there to repent

Anonymous said...

HDB also use the cardboard policeman strategy in the HDB carpark.
Have you seen the signs?
"Your camera, our security".
We the HDB lessees/"owners" who pay for the use of HDB carparks is also now providing security with our car cameras.

But HDB uses metal signages to say: "Your camera, our security".
Metal ok. Not cardboard.
Don't play, play.

Who supplies the metal signs ah?
Is it a $2 company?

agongkia said...

At Robinson road cpf building below and took my lunch inside a Cheers.
Thought bryani cost me S $5.50 but was told to pay S $8.00 .Bryani with a mutton bone.
Must have a poster with Chef photo to warn people like me,with warning like .....Check whether pocket got ten dollar before entering for Bryani here.

Anonymous said...

You pay me $1 million dollar salary with your hard earned money.
To do what job?
The job is to tell you that you are not responsible enough to look after your own money.

It is a privilege that you have such a qualified and honest person like me to look after you and your money.
And the $1 million dollar salary is a huge sacrifice for me to accept.

Anonymous said...

Visitors to the island can be forgiven for thinking that the entire population has been conditioned to resemble a cast of cardboard people devoid of soul or spirit.

Anonymous said...

I now believe the whole social system is made of cardboard. Looks nice in a fine weather with colourful paint and nice drawing. It crumbles when under rain water and get blown away in a windy night.

Anonymous said...

No cardboard no eat.
Neglected seniors of the richest place on planet Earth.

Anonymous said...

Try the most expensive city on Earth.

Anonymous said...

For a people to be govern by cardboards proves either that the people are so civilised or so robotic.

Which is which?

Anonymous said...

The leaders understand the Sinkies very well. They know the Sinkies have already been conditioned not to think, cannot think.

Just cardboards enough to control them.

The said...

Police force looks good from far:
a) on cardboards
b) on TV serials

In real life, police force are far from good:
c) Mas Selamat's escape from high-security prison
d) farce and fiasco during Little India riot

b said...

Outsourcing in public sector is the most easiest way to transfer public money into the private hands of certain elite family. It is all even legal. THe elites will get richer and the rest poorer.

Anonymous said...

Hi RB, speed. Singaporeans are by nature obedient and law abiding. I do not think you even need cardboard policemen to enforce the law where Singaporeans and concerned. After many years of conditioning and fear of the rotan, Singaporeans have become very timid and submissive. But now comes the FTs from other more uncultured countries. Maybe it is time for the need to have a police force to control these disobedient influx.

Anonymous said...

Maybe it is time for the need to have a police force to control these disobedient influx.
March 17, 2015 6:13 pm

No. Let's learn to be disobedient like the Aliens and vote out the paPIGS.

Anonymous said...

Pull the Plug Party.
Cancer Is Good Party.

Anonymous said...

I like to think that Singapore remains calm and peaceful. We need a highly trained, honest, diligent and efficient men-in-blue to look after our safety.

Anonymous said...

Cardboard ventilator.

The Realist of Artificiality said...

Singapore - Its Artificiality of Reality.

1. It calls itself a Country but it is not a country; it is just a City State.

2. Its existence has always been a Fluke of Fortune but claimed by some shameless people to be its Discoverer of Founder.

3. Its Independence was forced upon the people but claimed by some shameless people to be because of their Visionery, and therefore calls themselves the Fathers or Mothers of Singapore (more appropriately, Sin City).

4. It is more of a Communist State with the Dictatorship of a Political Party and the Ruling Elite, instead of the shameless proclamation of being a Parliamentary Democracy.

5. It operates through the rule by laws instead of rule of law.

6. Its leaders are merely administrators and managers instead of the shameless claim of being outstanding leaders.

7. Its politicians are self-serving, self-enriching, most selfish and egoistic technocrats who have not a single iota of political acumen, instead of real passionate politicians with a heart to truly and sincerely champion for the welfare and well-being of their people's livelihood and quality of life.


8. Its so-called Law Makers or Parliamentarians either absented themselves to do their personal business or go to the Parliament to sleep or doze off in full public view shamelessly without any respect for proper decorum.

9. Its Housing schemes are called House Ownership Schemes but are actually House Leasing Schemes of 99-year long-term rentals paid out-front in full, clearly stated in its legal papers of conveyance - the Title Deeds.

10. Its so-called Military Generals are actually book-worm Paper-Generals selected and promoted rapidly by the Ruling Elites or First Family.

11. Its so-called "Scholars" are actually not true Scholars who have accumulated vast amount of wisdom through years of practice and experience, but only school children who have been awarded scholarships.

12. Its people exorbitantly, obscenely and shamefully pay out-of-this-world salaries and bonuses to its Ministers and Top Elitist Civil Servants but get the lousiest derisory returns-on-investment in terms of housing, healthcare, education, jobs, livelihood, car-ownership, compulsory savings scheme, police protection, freedom, democracy, justice and equality.

13. Their Ministers and/or Members of Parliament and Top Civil Servants are rewarded with the world's highest remunerations to compensate them for enjoying unfettered power, high status, five-star ivory-tower luxury and comfort, with a entourage of civil servants, researchers and consultants to help them carry out their daily tasks and duties and shoulder their responsibilities when mistakes are made, while they need not account to their taxpaying citizenry; so as to prevent them from being corrupt and reward them for their shameless self-claimed so-called sacrifices, while their National Servicemen's true sacrifices of their lives and service of defending the country are not rewarded with equal justifications and emphasis, but stated as "cannot be measured in terms of dollars and cents" only.

The Realist of Artificiality said...

Singapore - Its Artificiality of Reality - Part 2.

14. Its National Pledge is not a national pledge but just an Aspiration.

15. Its current Prime Minister has 8 other ministers to help him do his job as a Prime Minister - i.e. 2 Deputy Prime Ministers, 2 Senior Ministers, 3 Ministers-Without-Portfolio in the Prime Minister's Office and his own father who was promoted to Minister Mentor but yet to perform efficiently and effectively to justify for his highly expensive pay, bonuses and perks.

16. Its people have to pay exorbitantly for owning a car buy paying 3 to 4 times the price of a vehicle which can be bought in neighouring countries and other countries the world over, yet they do not actually own the car. In reality, the State owns their cars.

17. Its Policemen are not real human beings but are made of Cheap and Convenient Cardboard with the image of a Handsome and Clean-Cut Person in Police Uniform. Its policemen cannot even protect themselves during a riot but they claim to be able to protect the citizens. And they don't even have any knowledge of the laws and has to refer the public to the lawyers when ask to clarify a certain legal aspect of a current occurrence, yet they are supposed to be the law enforcer to uphold the law.

18. Its people's money are not their money. Their savings are not their savings. Their leaders can any how come up with a series of scheming schemes to ensure that they cannot decide what to do with their money. When it is actually against their interests but shamelessly claimed by someone that it is good for them.

19. Its people's leaders are not their leaders but leaders for foreign talents, permanent residents and new citizens. Their parliamentarians are not their representatives but representatives of their own individual selfish selves, their own political party, the business and commercial organisations of which their are part of as directors or chairmen, and the ruling governing elites.

20. Its currency are artificially propped up with huge losses in their National Reserves amounting for the latest in the last six months (July-Dec 2014) to more than $34,000,000,000 of the citizens' hard-earned life-long blood-and-sweat CPF Savings and regressive taxes.

21. Its housing prices are artificially deliberately inflated through high rentals and sale prices annually either directly or indirectly by the agencies of the Power that be instead of by real market forces.

22. The list continues ...

By: The Realist of Artificiality - an Universal Citizen from the Cosmos known as The Milky Way.

Chua Chin Leng aka redbean said...

Hi The Realist of Artificiality,

Welcome to the blog and thanks for the contributions.

Anyone wants to disagree or dispute his comments?

Anonymous said...

Truth hurts.

Matilah_Singapura said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Matilah_Singapura said...

@ ALL:

The truth rocks :-) Singapore would be less "awesome" if there was no "artificiality".

Universal Law:

The people get the government and the cuntree they deserve.---, which emanates from the strengths and weaknesses of their CULTURE, expressed collectively over time; regardless of the political system. i.e. the people who govern/ rule/ dictate come from the very same cultural stock as the people they govern/ rule / dictate/ own / enslave / coerce / control/ extort/ brainwash/ etc etc.

Matilah Singapura is made of star-stuff: an organised clump of conscious, Darwinian-evolved baryonic matter which originated in the Big Bang/ cosmic inflation epoch, then nucleosynthesized in stars and supernovae.

Just as there is no god, there is no utopia either. Good luck to you if you're chasing a "perfect cuntree" run by a "perfect government" ruling by "perfect laws" over "perfect people".

Hallucinate much?