4/27/2014

The books that I would want to write



There are so many books that I would like to write about the golden years of Sin City. And many people too will be writing their books on the same topics with some being the originators of these fascinating stories. They could even call them autobiographies.

No, I am not going to write about making my first million in rupiahs. Too many people have written on that. The very first book that came to mind is ‘How to run down a profitable and sound public transport system.’ It is not easy, like they said, when something is running well and smoothly, it will take an exceptional talent to run it down, or maybe a dud to do it in his best. In the latter case, it will be so easy with the dud thinking he has really done an excellent job.

The second book is likely to be ‘How to run down a vibrant and profitable stock market singlehandedly.’ This is a much more difficult task to do compare to running down a train system. To run down a stock market, you must not only have a list of fictitious but grand money making schemes, but must convince those people who think they are very smart that the silly schemes you have hatched are really good. Having a brilliant scheme to convince smart people to go along is elementary. Convincing smart people with fictitious and destructive schemes and to have them going along needs the talent of a genius. The only time when you don’t need a genius is when the smart people are really gullible idiots in disguise. Then the job will be a piece of cake.

The third book, this must be more difficult than the above, ‘How to rob the people’s life savings without them knowing.’ The difficulty of this book is that in the former two, you only need to convince a few people to believe in you. That is not difficult when they themselves did not know what is happening or did not want to know what is happening as long as they can spend time counting their money. To con all the people in a saving’s scheme is not easy. And it is not easy to turn a good saving’s scheme into a monster, a life taking scheme when people have to commit suicide to get their money back.

In this third book, with millions of people having a vested interest to want to protect their money, it is not easy to pull wool over their eyes to prevent them from seeing or knowing what is happening to their money. And you need to keep doing it everyday and make them believe their money is still there when it is not there. For the moment they know their money is gone, everything will fall flat.

My fourth book, ‘How to sell a country right before the eyes of its people.’ In terms of difficulty level this must be above all the three books combined. No one has ever done this in history. Some tried and were killed as traitors. Actually I am wrong on this. There had been many cases of traitors in the history of China for conspiring with foreigner powers. The Ming Dynasty fell because of traitors working with the enemies outside. The Song Dynasty also had the same fate when an idiotic general chose to follow orders blindly, without question and refusing to question, and left his post to allow the enemies to overrun his troops leading to the fall of a dynasty. But some people honoured such idiots as role models of blind loyalty to the emperors.

In modern cities, selling a country is much easier as long as you have a willing citizenry that would not protest, happy to follow instructions or orders, willing to believe the leaders, and lost the ability to think and unable to see when things go wrong. This book is going to be very interesting and would likely be written by many historians in the future.

Come to think of it, there are many people more qualified to write such books as their biographies. It would be instant best sellers, something like ‘kiss and tell’.  Just imagine if the authors actually engineered the downfall of a public transport system or a stock exchange and live to tell the stories. Every book is a fertile material for a Hollywood movie.

Kopi Level - Green

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sinkies don't like to buy books lah, even those written by smart Sinkies.

But they like to read blogs that attack or make fun of PAP govt, and also to give some kopi money to the blogger if they are in their mood.

But whether books, blogs or whatever lah, the strongest opposition will never be ready to be govt.

Anonymous said...

Poolitical Jokes - Books I Like To See:
--------------------
"Under My Nose - The Johor I Never Knew" By Wong Kan Seng & Mas Selamat

"Investments - Learning By Failing" By Ho Ching & The 3 Stooges

"Raw Talent - What Mentoring, Schooling and Money Cannot Change"
By Lee Hsien Loong

Anonymous said...


RB, I think your fifth book
should be entitled:

"What Must We Do Now!"

The "Erected Truths" to Keep The Cuntry Going said...

Anon 10.30 //RB, I think your fifth book
should be entitled:

"What Must We Do Now!//


Do you mean a book entitled:

"Two men's views of the W-ore"

Co-authored by Mati and Gongkia

Anonymous said...

Dear RB, it is sad that suicides are on the rise in Singapore. Strangely, the main acronyms used by our useless leaders speaks volume, for instance, CPF aka (Cunning Phony Fraudsters) had intentionally inflated the ceiling price of the current HDB aka (High Diving Board) which somehow made it very necessary for suicidal SG’s to snuff out their bad debts by diving over the parapet so as to give sustenance for their spouse and children. (Remember Mdm Loke) Moreover, our dilemma is actually caused by the PAP (Pimps and Prostitutes). They be the pimps and we the jobless prostitutes. As thuggish pimps the globe over, they take most of our earnings and give us the crumbs forcing the overwhelmed weaker SG’s into immolation. However, your proposed book must seek to change the game plan by marking an X where history will be rewritten and Changi will be a good retirement home for many of them. Singapore has become ugly beyond recognition and we need to recapture it before it is too late. Hope to see you at Gilberts May Day Rally. Since I am a confirmed certified bigot, I must make my presence felt.

Anonymous said...

These books if were to be written, the hard copy will never see the light, even if you go to Kinokuniya you will be lucky to find it hide at a small conner.

So please written in internet, make sure you get the green light from the authority!!! or else do not dream of the books.

Anonymous said...

RB will be better off making money by writing blogs than writing books.

Smart Sinkies will be better off making money or joining PAP than joining opposition.

WP will be better off not ready to be govt than ready.

PAP will be better off to continue to take in more foreign talents than not.

Daft Sinkies will be better off by learning to be smart.

Anonymous said...

Anon 12:50 pm

What u said is very tiok. Because it has happened, is happening and will continue to happen.

And with that, daft Sinkies should remain at 40% or less.

Anonymous said...

Water will flow from high places to low places.

Matilah_Singapura said...

Yeah. I've been thinking of writing too. But I like fucking, and also like assisting people for money. So I think the books I should be working on are those which focus on helping people -- especially apeks and uncles -- become better at banging.

My titles would probably look like:

1. The Apeks and Uncles Guide to Wild Sex in Singapore

2. What Lau Sui MILFs want

3. Banging in Batam

4. The God Of Geylang -- the definitive guide for Horny Uncles

5. Uncle: Don't fart when you cum or you might shit on the girl...and other pieces of advice your mum never told you.

I reckon I could get a few best sellers out of those. I'll even turn up for book signing at Kinokuniya. Hope to see you there -)

Eddie Leong said...

ha ha.

This is one of my favourite sites. You are witty enough to avoid being bankrupted by lawsuits.

But please make sure you are squeaky clean in your tax filings, GST claims, even writing a check. ha ha.

But if you offered free food and accommodation one day (you know what I mean), I will send you greeting cards..."See you soon..." ha ha.

b said...

Sg is not the best but also not bad especially compared to many third world cumtree. Sinkies just have to learn to be wiser to avoid all the traps and con schemes set up by the rich and powerful. There have always been two sets of rules since day one. One for the pheasants ( e.g. be good and honest) and one for the rich and powerful (e.g. increase your wealth at all costs). When people are wise enough, certain kind of rulers will not be able to get elected again and again.

Anonymous said...

Matilar, u can also write the following books

1) how to boast about sexual power when both tiny are missing
2) the art of incest
3) the guide on how to bull shits
4) how to irritate people and waste their time daily
5) learning to be thick skin and flameproof
6) how to tahan when your ass kena fucked
7) how to act as patriot when you are a traitor
8) how to act and look normal when you are actually insane
9) learning to speak when a cock is stuck in your mouth
10) how to con your sisters and daughters to continue having sex with you without reporting to the police.

I am quite sure others can contribute other ideas for matilar so that he can become very rich like he always dream of. Knn motherfucker that waste the earth resources.

Anonymous said...

OMG @#$%^&*()_+