6/14/2013

The tragic choice of a troubled and distraught mother

We have all read about the 31 year old unemployed mother who dropped her 9 year old son from her flat. The poor child died. The poor child was a special needs child, needing special attention and special school. The poor mother had to stop work to look after him full time. And she has only her own mother to support her with her mother’s miserable income of $1,000 pm. Yes, a $1,000 income in the richest country in the world is miserable, barely enough to keep one alive. Some will disagree and claim that a $1,000 income could afford to buy a public flat and get by. Well some will believe it is possible.

How could three persons, an old lady, a young mother and a special needs child lived on a $1,000 income. Maybe there were some handouts from the govt or some charitable organizations. This is a tragic story of the lives of three miserable beans trying to get by in one of the most expensive country in the world.

How many of you think it is easy to live with $1,000? After deducting some of the compulsory bills and expenses there would be nothing much left. The three would be lucky if the remainder was enough just for food and nothing else. No matter how reclusive a life they led, there must be plenty of other expenses to pay for, the schooling for the child, the medical expenses, and what not.

What choice is there for the young woman, for the poor child and the poor grandmother? What kind of existence, with money not enough, and with nothing but a life centred on caring for the needs of the special child. Don’t ask me.

Anyone in this most expensive city in Asia and probably the whole world, if struck by a sickness that needs repetitive care and medicine, unless one is a millionaire, how many will earn enough just to take care of the medical needs and medical bills? A person with kidney problem and needing dialysis, mind you the cheapest is still going to cost at least a $1000 a month if I am not wrong. An aged or invalid in a nursing home is going to cost a couple of thousands at the lower end and pray no extra medical costs. There are those that need chemotherapy, physiotherapy or ‘whateverapy’, as long as the treatment is prolong, the poor chap is going to be bankrupt in no time, or the poor chap is going to bankrupt the family members.

Long term medical care, long term care for the special needs children, long term care for the aged etc etc are very unaffordable. Many families are shouldering such emotional baggage and financial burden and only they themselves understand the meaning of medical cost.

The poor woman, now in prison for delivering her son, would probably think it is better to end it all. The poor child will be her life of living hell. She would have nothing else to live for short of a miracle, a little mercy from some kind souls.

How many people are in the same plight, and pondering to do the same, to end it all, in the most expensive city in the world where every one other person is a millionaire or half a millionaire? Not many of these millionaires or half a millionaires can afford a long term illness or long term care for a member of his/her family. It is no joke.

The poor woman in prison is likely to remain in prison for the rest of her life. She just switched from a prison without bars to behind bars. The latter may be less demanding financially and emotionally less draining. At least she will have a life of her own to live for, behind bars. At least she set free the poor boy trapped in a flawed body. Some may disagree and think it is better for the boy to continue to live. What about her mother, now with all $1,000 to herself for as long as she can work?

33 comments:

Anonymous said...

To the guilty ones who drove the single mother to desperation.
You know who you are.
You have blood on your hands.

I hope you rot in hell.

Anonymous said...

It is easy to blame the mother who pushed the son down (if true) but how many actually know whats going on in her life? Yes, no one should take a life away but under her conditions maybe there is really no choice left.

PAP does not encourage full charity but has enough help being given to her? Where is the support? How can grassroot leaders not alerted of her plight?

Anonymous said...

How much do you want? 3 meals a day in a hawker center, food court or restaurant?

Anonymous said...

Charity will never help enough to provide a comfortable life.

So don't depend on charity if you want a comfortable life.

Anonymous said...

Anon 4:13. In the case mentioned, I believe the three souls are not seeking comfortable life. As RB has said, besides food items, there are so many costs the family has to bear. Charity definately need to extend their hand in this case. Don't spend billions on new fighter aircraft, don't keep billions in reserves, don't bull about grassroot leaders contribution. Tragedy like this could be averted if there is a caring heart.

Anonymous said...

EXTREMELY SAD CASE!

SAD FOR SINGAPORE!

SAD FOR ALL!

Anonymous said...

The govt should stop creating more redundant positions which are extremely costly to tax payers. Why suddenly we need all these new positions?



Veritas said...

Healthcare is not expensive. Even Thailand can provide free HIV treatment while our patients pay their way to bankruptcy.

Similarly public support for disabilities is not expensive. We can afford it.

Also we use to have free dental care until JC. That did not banktupt us but they certainly keep business away from private dentists who are charging 200SGD for a regular visit.

PAP has been spinning lies. PAP are jacking up our healthcare, paying big bucks to medical cartel.

Medical cartel did not benefit Singapore. Today, most doctors are imported while PAP keep our medical school intake low.

I have written article about Singapore medical cartel drawing data from their SMC year book. The next year SMC obscure all the data.

Virgo 49 said...

Hi anon@3.47.

grassroots famous quote: NOTHING THAT WE KNOW OFF.

Anonymous said...

We are paying way too much to the President who is only doing a ceremonial role.

Veritas said...

Get real, Kuan Yew is playing a game of social darwinism, slaverism and caste-ism.

Kuan Yew think that he get make us progress by making everyone backstab one another, and fittest survive.

The loser will lost their right to reproduce and go extinct. Also bad gene who produce cogenital disability will be weeded out by creating a big medical vacuum, sucking $$$ from these family, sterilize them.

Unfortunately, his vision will only bring us to the India style. Before 3500 years ago, India was the most civilize, advance and high IQ country in the world. Due to the wicked Brahmin style who impose Kuan Yew-ism on them, today India is a shithole.

Kuan Yew-ism of social darwinism, to each his own-ism, caste-ism is essentially high caste Indian style. Kuan Yew is diametrically opposite to our Chinese culture.

Take down PAP even though its already too late

Anonymous said...

Positions created like president, senior minister, minister mentor, minister without portfolio, costs tax payer millions of $$$$$$$$!

why got Senior minister-of-state and minister-of state so many types? other country only got one deputy minister.

and only one dpm.

Money saved can help many people like the poor woman correct or not?

Anonymous said...

Many countries which are much bigger only has one deputy prime minister.

Anonymous said...

Papayas society only works in an ideal world - there are no pysically or mentally challenged people, no kids, no elderly, - everyone is able and productive and generating incomes for them. Papayas forgotten this kind of world does not exist. Papayas are detached from reality and suffered from hallucination and of unsound mind. According to the constitution, they are not fitted to govern and thus should step down.

Anonymous said...

Its really really sad n heartbreaking when read this sort of tragedy ...I cried painfully both physically n
Emotionally .....

Wat really happen to our society ????

V v v sad

Anonymous said...

Wat really happen to our society ????

We voted for the Party Against People.

Virgo 49 said...

hi bro, do not forget we have mayors, appointments for retired BGs etc.

These jokers are already rich enough, why have all these appointments to further suck the blood from the poor.

Anonymous said...

"SEE PAI KO LIAN"

Ⓜatilah $ingapura⚠️ said...

As far as I'm concerned the mother is a fucking murderer, and she should hang for what she did.

As a mother ===> EPIC FAIL!

Ⓜatilah $ingapura⚠️ said...

redbean,

Please lah. Stp the cry-baby bullshit trying to pin blame on "society", "expensive cost of living" yada yada.

Adults, like it or not, are responsible for their actions. As a parent, you are entrusted with the life of your children. No matter how hard it gets -- life is hard, get used to it -- you don't EVER quit on your kids. Never. Not an option.

Poor kid, splat like an egg on the pavement. Hang the bitch. Fuck her. Mitigating circumstances? Zero.

Anonymous said...

This is a case of breakdown of our social fabric since the formation of the nuclear family, the aftermath of progress and growth at all cost.

Why is the woman a single mother, cause the mother fucker who help produce the sick boy just ran away!!!! SHIT.

Why is there no other support apart from her aging mother... cause OUR great leader did a 2 is enough 40 years ago!!! another SHIT.

Where is the social welfare???
"Kee Chiu" is the acting minister, please start looking at this, as his mum was single mother as well, so he knows how difficult it will be for the mother!!! "Kee Chiu" please act on it, there may be many such cases... address it before it becomes like the jumping of MRT Track, which will become very costly.

Please start working on a gracious society and stop the "Talking Cock", HOT AIR is free, but we need actions....

There are many displaced PMETs, senior Singaporeans, single parents that really need help inspite of the fact that we have one of the highest PPP in the world, and many Number ONE in the world.... but we also have many Number ONE "cock up" in the world... like our current MRT situation due to over crowding and over weight trains that broke the system.....

Anonymous said...

RB I fully support ur kind hearted thoughts ...
Yes the mother killed d baby ..but y ? Who can understand her pain n agony all these years .... She is wrong definitely to do that but is a tragedy to her too ... She may not have the mental strength n iq to cope ...
The society n system itself does not have the radar to detect such family?
R we more interested to made money than anything else ?
R we really that inclusive that we inspire to achieve ...
I m v v v v sick of our $$ society ....
I remember some big shots always trumpet we have a robust social safety net to take care of the needy ... Do we have really? Or we have a broken net or a net made from instant noodles ....???
We can have bay gardens, give $$$ to bring in foreign students , spent astronomical $ on f35 n other budget .... Yet we cant help our own needy ....
We r a sick society !!!!!

agongkia said...

That is why I always tell others that single mothers are quite pitiful and I vow to take care of them if I see them.Divorcee,widowed.
...See 1 take care of 1.

I am not rich to offer financial help but I do have something special to offer them to give them happiness.....

This 31 years old should be acquitted and release.I have reason to believe she is still having post natal blue and depression.Lets have a more caring society.What she need is concern and not punishment.

Oops,before someone accuse me of being a cheekopek and making fun of them,I better clarify......I mean I have special relationship with some HR and can recommend those single mums decent flexi hours jobs if they need .Single mothers should not feel down or feel being discriminated.Me hope to see zero such pitiful cases.
Please set her free.


bond said...

>>828pm

I think your heart is black or you have no heart at all. At the least, you do not have to hurl insults any further.

In this era, a gov is there to make lives more worse off not better off. In other words, always vote for a less competent party - less competent in screwing the people.

Who are we to judge whether she is a sinner? Who have not sinned?

I am sad that such things happened again and again. As a society, as a human, as flesh and blood, we should try to eliminate such things from happening, especially those who have the power but do nothing, they are the true murderers.

Anonymous said...

This is an ironic strange world - when you killed one person, you are murderer but if you killed hundreds or thousands, you are a hero and knighted. Justice is a myth.

Anonymous said...

Not long ago, some foreigner killed someone in a road accident but was not given death penalty but just a couple month jail terms. The best way to kill: just a car?

Ⓜatilah $ingapura⚠️ said...

@bond 312:

>> I think your heart is black or you have no heart at all.

That's ok. You are welcome to speculate about anything regarding my biology. The fact is whatever to think in that regard is IRRELEVANT to the issue at hand.

>> At the least, you do not have to hurl insults any further.

You are right. I don't. But I can, if I choose to :-)

>> In this era, a gov is there to make lives more worse off not better off. In other words, always vote for a less competent party - less competent in screwing the people.

Oh, so now it is the government's fault. Gimme a break lah. Everyone is accountable for their actions -- doesn't matter what the emotional state at the time is. Ever heard of "self control"?

Granted, "self control" might be challenging when you are trying to stop drinking, smoking or over eating. And it's ok to "fail" because tomorrow you can simply pick it up and try again and again until you find the will to not surrender to your urges.

However, throwing your child to their death? Please lah. There is absolutely no excuse for that.

>>
Who are we to judge whether she is a sinner?


As an atheist and hard-line anti-theist, I do not subscribe to the idea of "sin". Anyway, I'm not judging her as a sinner. I'm judging her as a law breaker, a criminal, a murderer, a baby-killer.

>> Who have not sinned?

Only those who are stupid enough not to. Many so-called "sins" (which do not hurt anyone else) are awesome fun things to do, or are necessary -- like blasphemy: Fuck all gods. Religion makes people STUPID IDIOTS

>> I am sad that such things happened again and again.

Where have they been happening "again and again". You are hallucinating, allowing your emotions to rule. Epic FAIL!

>>As a society, as a human, as flesh and blood,

Actually society is make up of INDIVIDUALS, it is The Individual who is "flesh and blood". And no, it is quite impossible to eliminate things.

Frameworks already exist in Singapore to deal. These excellent examples of humanity do fantastic work and are credited with saving countless of lives over the DECADES that they've been in existence. BUT as An Individual in a distraught state, one must still pick up the phone and call, or reach out to someone who will make THAT CALL. You don't just rush outside and throw your baby to the pavement without at least PAUSING and considering "options".

Sorry, there is no plausible "defense" for the mother's actions.

>> especially those who have the power but do nothing, they are the true murderers.

That is just COMPLETE NONSENSE. To commit "murder", action must be taken. No action, no murder. Don't believe me? Check with the courts. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Sometimes no action can also kill. The gov should provide free care for these special needs people and throw in free bus transport so that the mother can be enable to work rather than throwing money at some stupid yog, gardens, foreigners scholarship. Tio bo? Time to discard and write off this regime.

Ⓜatilah $ingapura⚠️ said...

@330 (another certifiable idiot)

>> Sometimes no action can also kill.

Sure. If only you would choose to stop the act of you breathing. Perhaps the result would benefit mankind ;-)

Anyway, if you read carefully I was referring to MURDER. Murder requires action -- no action, no murder.

So far no one except me has used the word MURDER.

>> rather than throwing money at some stupid yog, gardens, foreigners scholarship.

Nonsense. I like those gardens, and the govt should "throw money" to make Singapore more awesome.

>> Tio bo?

Obviously, you bo tio. Nevermind. Continue sleeping.

>> Time to discard and write off this regime.

Te govt has nothing to do with this lah. Please. Anyway, 50 years later you want a change. I've been asking for a change since the mid 1970's lah, and Singaporeans still continue to vote them in.

How come the evil bitch didn't kill herself, and leave her baby in this world to be adopted -- give it at least a chance? Oh no. She saves herself, but MURDERS her child.

Prepare Changi for another hanging lah!

Anonymous said...

MS, you are not a judge. You are not fit to say it is murder. The trial has not yet started yet. Give her the benefit of doubts you asshole.

Anonymous said...

'govt has nothing to do with this lah'

- MS, u dumb or what? cannot read properly? the boy was dropped from the flat. the mother built the flat? it is the gov. of cos the gov has something to do with this case. u crazy stupid foreign asshole banana.

Ⓜatilah $ingapura⚠️ said...

@447: Nope. I'm calling it MURDER. You are entitled to your opinion -- which ain't worth much ;-)


@450:

>> it is the gov. of cos the gov has something to do with this case.

Yes. I do stand corrected, only because you've shifted the context.

The government's courts and judges are now the sole determinant of guilt or innocence. In this context, the government has everything to do with the case ;-)

Anymore flames, you dumb motherfuckers of bullshit "compassion"?

Anonymous said...

@828pm

You are wrong again - you crazy dumb asshole. I do not f*** mothers especially your one (even if it is FOC) for very obvious reason.